3 clubs, 23 rounds, A slab of passion….

Mick’s Big Round 13 Upsets

Amongst the predictable beltings this round, came a rich seam of match day beauty producing alluvial contested gold.

We begin by musing on the notion that if St Kilda was a grape we’d be collectively quaffing them after Geelong’s savage boots and all harvest bottling on their own vintage dung hill. Sainters on track for their 27th wooden spoon, their first since 2000.

Over at Princess Park a triplet of Blues events is over shadowed by another – albeit, close – defeat at the hands of the walking wounded Hawks:

1. Mick Malted#milkshake#House “so individual” 700th game as an AFL coach. That’s a lot of press conferences. Lots of stares

2. President and club top 5 of all time Steven “Sticks” Kernahan’s last game at the helm before stepping down.

Elmore_James3. The 150th Carlton anniversary where the top 5 Blues of all time were announced. Big names too – Muddy Waters (aka Sticks himself, Stephen Kernahan), BB King(aka Stephen Silvagni), Howlin Wolf (aka Alex Jesaulenko), Robert Johnson (aka John Nicolls)  and the indefatigable master of slide guitar Elmore James (aka Bruce Doull – left).

Brendan Fevola; the wayward yet enigmatic prop and big goal Mediterranean full forward, came back to the Blues for the first time since being shown the door after those paralytic Footy Show vox pops on Brownlow night 2009. His reference that night to vaunted Blues captain Chris Judd as a Steven Seagal channelling “pressure point” applier to opponents in a hammered reference to the skippers suspension was the last straw after a long honour roll of loss of control. Judd deadpanned at the tribunal “I’ve since watched a juddfevolacouple of Steven Seagal movies and realised that pressure points are no laughing matter”

Post Game, stand in Hawka coach replacement that even Clarko can tower over Brendan Bolton and his wide eyed grin in the post game press conference continues to engage the excited child close to our in the day heroes in all of us

Captain of unconsciousness Jonathan Brown was knocked out again as Brisbane battled the Orange people. Once Brownie was escorted from the ground whilst channeling the physical and mental agility of the Thunderbirds cast, the Lion’s lost total momentum to the emerging midfield strength of the Greater Western Sydney “search for a star” talent pool.

North Melbourne’s implosion against Adelaide another test of fans mettle. While home game roller-coaster Roo fans can still take solace in sliding another hot dog out of the thermos in a comfort food exorcism of the games bottom line, tonight’s Adelaide oval clash presents only one option after half time – to refuse to bear witness and sever the power to the television set.

funny_pictures_couple_in_thWest coast Eagles keep an emaciated flame alive in suffocating the Gold Coast Suns. Fans there have found a novel way to pay tribute to Ben Cousin’s shirtless arrest with these fetching his and her game day ponchos that exploit both Perth’s mild climate and tolerance for the (wo)man in white. Y Fronts a handy accessory in the event of a “going commando” Eagle loss at home and the need to fly the white flag.

The Western Bulldogs have mostly this season been prepared to fight until they have to be put to sleep. And sleep they have. Dogs whup Pies and they’re still drinkin at the Rising Hotel, West Footscray. The Banjo is out and there’ll be bluebirds over the red, white and blue cliffs of Dogland. Drink up dogs, your next opponent is Port, at Adelaide oval, in front of 50,000 fans whom, save about 50 who might make the trip, hate your club’s guts.

Richmond gallant against Freo but beaten by Hayden Ballantyne (6 goals) and Matthew Pavlich (3 goals). The Tiger punishment continues with Sydney next on the MCG menu.

photo(3)Melbourne for so long the priority pick somnambulist has been rudely awaken into the belief transplanted by Paul Roos. Essendon reeling from the long overdue issuing by ASADA of “show cause” notices went down at the death after surrendering a potentially match winning lead in a tussle that could have gone either way. TV and Radio sport wrecked again as the long cast of Dons personnel and alleged substances cast another pall over our entertainment.

taxidriver-thumb-510x298-39091As a nation we love to whinge and this fog refuses to lift from the low corners where it’s settled around the topography of game quality, umpiring and defensive football. This round we’re confronted with the life affirming sun breaking through in the form of:

  • Eddie Betts strolling around the boundary, releasing an unorthodox flat spinning “mongrel” and splitting what little daylight separated the sticks at about the same time the canapes are being served up to Fev at the Carlton 150th.
  • Buddy kicking the last 5 goals against Port to win the game off his own superboot including two corkers, one from 70 metres and one from the other side from 60.
  • Hawk Suckling trundling back onto to that lethal left and piercing the posts from 55 metres off a couple of steps.
  • Cyril backing his innate understanding of both trigonometry and spin in squirting a perfect dribbler from 35 after burning off an opponent – you guessed it  – “Special
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Hit me on the chest with your centimetre perfect pass